Peter Sullivan on navigating a 'transformed reality'
Considering he who's lost almost 40 years of his life due to a crime he was innocent of, Peter Sullivan projects a remarkably positive outlook.
In our conversation last month, for what was his first interview since being released from prison in May, he was upbeat and looking forward to getting to Anfield to watch Liverpool play for the opening match since he was detained in 1986.
That was the year of the violent killing of Diane Sindall in his birthplace of Birkenhead - an event he said he was merely aware of because someone turned to him in a pub at the time and said, "allegedly there's been a murder".
When he was convicted the following year at Liverpool Crown Court - he was condemned to a lifetime in some of Britain's highest-security category A prisons where he would be hounded by his tabloid nicknames "Birkenhead's Monster", "The Mersey Ripper" and "The Wolfman".
Adapting to a Modern World
Before our interview, he was rich with anecdotes about how since his exoneration he has had to adjust to a fundamentally altered world.
When he was taken into custody, Margaret Thatcher was in Downing Street, the concept of the internet and Europe was still divided by the Iron Curtain.
He described watching the fall of the Berlin Wall from a shared television in prison.
Mr Sullivan told me how trips to the shops now show how "the world has transformed" - from trying to understand how self-checkouts operate to realising that "in place of having a cheque book, you've got it on your phone".
Modern Surprises
His incarceration means he has been ignorant of the way so many aspects of everyday life have evolved - almost like someone who has been in hibernation since the 1980s.
"After spending so long in prison and finding out there's no DHSS [Department of Health and Social Security, now the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP)] where you can pick up your money - you're thinking, 'Wow, what's going on here?'"
He now has a smartphone, after discovering doctor's appointments need to be arranged on something he now knows is called an 'app'.
He first became knowledgeable about them when he was traveling on a bus shortly after his liberation and saw people operating smartphones. He only realised they were phones when he saw someone put one to their ear.
Emotional Impact
Mr Sullivan's 14,000 days in confinement have also led to an inevitable sense of system dependency.
He remembered how after his freedom, one morning in his flat he returned to his bedroom and settled on his bed, because he was subconsciously waiting for a prison officer to come and lock him back into his cell.
"It's required to be at your door at a designated moment, otherwise the officers will discipline you", he said.
"I remained thinking, 'Why am I here?'"
Desiring Explanation
But Mr Sullivan's hope is tempered by a yearning for answers about how he was charged with an infamous murder that he didn't commit, and a bewilderment about why he still has not had an admission of error.
"My entire life vanished", he said.
"Freedom disappeared, I lost my mother since I've been in prison, I've lost my father.
"It pains me because I wasn't there for them", he said.
"I can't carry on with my life if I can't get an answer off them."
"That's all I want, an apology [and to understand] the reason why they've done this to me", he said.
Law Enforcement Response
Merseyside Police said "limited value to be gained for a reassessment of this matter today" because of "advancements to investigative techniques and progress in the law over the last 40 years".
The force did submit some of Mr Sullivan's accusations to the police oversight body, the Independent Office for Police Conduct (IOPC), who will now investigate his claims that officers beat him up and intimidated to link him to other crimes if he didn't plead guilty to Diane Sindall's murder.
When asked if it would apologise, the force did not directly answer the question, but as part of a comprehensive declaration it said: "The force acknowledges that there has been a grave miscarriage of justice in this case".
Looking Ahead
Mr Sullivan shared about his modest ambition - an ambition that he said he had given up of being able to accomplish at some points over his approximately 38 years behind bars.
"The sole objective to do now is continue with my own life and progress as I was before, and experience freedom now".
His life ahead may be made less challenging by government monetary award, paid to victims of judicial errors.
This system is restricted at £1.3m, a limit which it is believed his eventual payout will get very approach.
But the procedure is not automatic, and it is time-consuming.
Andrew Malkinson, whose conviction for a rape he had no involvement in was quashed in 2023, was only granted an temporary payment earlier this year.
Convicted criminals who admit to their crimes and are freed get a accommodation and some assistance for living expenses. Mr Sullivan, as an exonerated person, is not entitled to that help.
And so he is surviving a basic lifestyle, with his modest ambitions - although many consider he is a millionaire in waiting.
His lawyer, Sarah Myatt, said "no amount that you could say that would be adequate for sacrificing 38 years of your life".